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Stay
Gold

stay gold forever

being here with you


we were meant to fly

you got me
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and i got you
this layout was hand coded by twelfthnight ( else ) with inspiration from Gold Forever by The Wanted. Gold from colourlovers

ugh
Wednesday, August 28, 2013 // 3:00 PM

studying makes me so fat :(

or maybe it's the winter

ugh

winter makes me so fat

:(

I'll get my sexy legs for summer, you'll see!

LOL anyway, It's been a while hey?

I will come back with an update soon! but as for now...

breakfast !

irony
Thursday, August 22, 2013 // 6:47 PM

lackadaisical is one of the most enthusiastic sounding words I've ever heard

just the beat inside my soul
// 1:20 AM

The last 24 hours have been shit.

Pure shit.

Okay, that may be pushing it, but it hasn't been great.

I hate coming to something unprepared - that's why when I'm to go to/do somewhere/thing for the first time, I get a bit antsy because I don't like that feeling - the one you get when you just don't know. Fuck, I don't know how to explain it. It's not quite the fact that I don't like meeting new people or doing things for the first time. I can do all that just fine, it's more like this feeling I get when I'm alone and new and stuff LOL

Anyway, that's besides the point. I fucking hate being unprepared and despite my flimsy attempt to prepare myself for work and for today's labs, I have inevitably gotten myself into the above mentioned state, feeling that strange feeling.

I was talking to Collin about this today and he told me not to worry, cos I always come out the other end satisfied. I guess that was true today, but it doesn't change the fact that I put myself through all that worry and crappy feeling and eugh.

If I was just more prepared. If I could just be that little bit more willing to be prepared, to study, to revise, to compile, to try to just understand. I guess I'd be okay.

I can feel it. I can feel my words and my actions forming a little canal. One just long enough and wide enough for my body so I can just bury myself in these nasty little habits that I'm picking up. The ones that are only supposed to be temporary.

It feels like I used to be a better person, but I really can't tell anymore.

Thursday, August 15, 2013 // 3:43 PM

I am so poor :(

Anatomy lab was kind of a drag cos we told our demonstrator to go in depth with a few bones cos our lecturer ran out of time and couldn't go through them. That was a mistake. I wanted to fall asleep so many times. The high brought about by the cadavers has also subsided. I'm realising so many things and I'm getting v scared. I always fuck things up for myself when it comes to this. Ugh.

I think I've been putting off my anatomy work cos that lab was just eugh LOL

I know I should try to be a better person

But I kind of don't want to be. Not yet.

Give me some time.

so
Monday, August 12, 2013 // 2:25 PM

How am I feeling?

LOL I'm actually okay.

I had dinner with Collin last night which was really exciting cos he's been MIA since we got our piercings, so I was glad.

We were talking the entire ride home in a carriage which was dead quiet and everyone could hear our conversation LOL it dawned on us so many times but we didn't ever stay quiet for long

I've been bargaining with myself a lot lately. I tell myself that if I write up my notes for BIOS and ANAT and do my Chem tutorial work, I get to watch one episode of Grey's Anatomy LOL

That's what I did last night. Spent some time with the douche bag I love, completed my work and had enough time left over for a bit of leisure. I reckon I'd be set if the rest of my life were to progress this way.

I actually don't mind my work - it's quiet interesting LOL

BUT, my bargaining isn't always warranted or traded off for something good. Like, I told myself that I wasn't going to my Maths lecture yesterday so I could eat with Kevin instead. The roof came off of the lecture theater my maths lecture was held in because of the wind LOL so I'm going to take that as a sing from God, telling me that it was okay to skip just yesterday's lecture LOL

Anyway, anatomy lab today. Ultra keen

How are you?

JESS PHANNNNNNNNNN

thoughts
Saturday, August 10, 2013 // 6:40 PM


  • The solo in yellow brick road is beautiful
  • Meet me under shining lights, I've been waiting right here all my life
  • ofwgkta
  • finally downloaded me old music
  • mosh head
  • i fucking love taylor swift
  • SO BOREDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
  • investing time in something that's going to lead me nowhere
  • but i'm doing it anyway
  • should've gone out last night
  • OMG THE SEASON 5 FINALE OF GREY'S ANATOMY. MY FEELINGS. OMFGGGGGGGGGGGG
  • What do I do with life now?
  • season 6 feels wrong
  • you brought this onto yourself
  • you don't need me
  • you just think that you do
  • don't get upset
  • I'm here if you are
  • but you don't need me
  • feels - giraffage next saturday :)
  • close 2 me is better, danny LOL
  • I can get my frank ocean money back LOL
  • first week of uni was pretty good
  • met a girl who reminds me of janice ian LOL
  • this would work a lot better if there weren't any dot points
  • I FUCKING HATE chem lectures
  • Hate is a strong word, I don't mean it
  • such a beautiful weather
  • I wish I lived on the beach
  • I hate wasting time
  • They're wasting mine
  • Who would I be, who would have me if they were removed from my life
  • ?
  • I should be outside

I should be doing work
// 5:32 AM

Been pulled over?
Yeah, RBT

Dyed your hair?
Nope

Pulled an all-nighter?
Yes, three times now LOL

Baked a cake?
yes

Fallen down in public?
yes of course LOL

Been caught making out?
Yes?

Taken a pregnancy test?
nope

Broken a bone?
no and I hope I never have to.

Had braces?
Have em right nowwwwww

Gone skinny dipping?
Yes

Built something out of wood?
Bulsa wood? yeah 

Been to Disneyland?
Yep :)

Eaten a Krispy Kreme donut?
So many times LOL

Screamed during a scary movie?
LOL yeah

Showered with someone of the opposite sex?
Yes

Been to a professional sporting event?
No

Slept till noon?
Not often, but yeah

Been arrested?
no

Opened Christmas presents early?
yes

Played Scrabble?
yes

Rolled down a hill?
ya

Toilet papered someone's house?
No, very close to, though LOL

Laughed so hard you cried?
yep LOL

Burned yourself with a curling iron?
LOL nope, but I have with a straightener

Been hit on by someone too old?
Yes.... 

Gotten seasick?
Nope

Eaten food that fell on the floor?
... yes LOL

Given a hickey?
yes

Shared a sucker with your dog?
I don;t have a dog anymore :'(

Been in an accident?
Yep

Had chickenpox?
Yep

Shopped at Home Depot?
Nope

Spied on your neighbors?
Yup

Plucked your eyebrows?
Yup

Ridden in a limo?
Yup

Had a pet fish?
Yup

Lied about your age?
Yup

Bought something at a yard sale?
Yup

Fired a gun?
Yup. Nerf gun LOL I WILL SOON, I KNOW IT

Been drunk?
Yup

Had a cavity?
I recall having 8

Been ice skating?
Yup

Handed out candy to trick-or-treaters?
Nup

Been in the hospital?
Yeah

Made a prank call?
yes. omg these questions are boring LOL

Been sick on your birthday?
Nope

Gotten a tattoo?
Nope

Had food come out your nose?
Dear lord no LOl and I hope it never does

Gone out without underwear?
Nope

Had a massage?
Yup

Locked your keys in the car?
How does that happen LOL

Ridden a horse?
Yep :)

Been lost?
Yep LOL but not for long

Held a $100 bill?
Yes

Been to Europe?
NOT YET, BUT I WILL. YOU'LL SEE. I'LL GO TO EUROPE. YOU'LL SEE!

Built a fire?
Yes

Slept Naked?
Yes

Been skydiving?
NOT YET, BUT I WILL. YOU'LL SEE. I'LL SKYDIVE. YOU'LL SEE!

Hogged the covers on purpose?
No, tht is cruel

Played golf?
Not properly

Watched the Weather Channel?
Yes

Had a manicure?
Yes

Made mashed potatoes?
Yes

Written your phone number on a napkin?
Nope. Don't carry a pen around LOL

Been to the circus?
No, unfortunately :(

Week 4 part 2 + etc
// 4:44 AM

 Further images from Tracey's 18th :)

 Tracey and her sister, Kelly made this
 And this

 Went to TK something with Col, Drew, Bobs, Maria, Huynh and Mai
 Went to movies later, Huynh, Mai, Collin and I watched the conjuring. It was actually very good in terms of scare factor and storyline LOL the others watched world ar z which apparently was also v scary
 First day back at uni. Hellen's first day at UNSW!
 She peer pressured me into skipping the rest of my lectures to go and eat at Jazz City Diner. It was closed LOL so we ate at Mr. Crackles on Oxford. It was pretty damn good. Lamb roll with chilli cheese fries and salted pork crackling in the bg
 This was actually v nice, but also sickening. It smelt like dexter, my sisters dog LOL
 Waiting for Kim to pick us up :'(
 That thursday, Snez shouted us yum cha! Then Maria Snez and I went to grab coffee and cake at Livo
 Burning shit at Collins

 This looked like death. Like an emphysemic lung
 Burning marshmellows for the fun of it
 It started to look like cancer LOL
 Breakfast at midnight at City Extra. So good.
 Nachos. Yum. So hungry right now
 Drove to the lookout to watch the sunrise. We were a bit too south easterly LOL rose behind us ish
 Still v nice.
 Pre-Clinic dinner
 Trinh bailed on us so we'd whatsapp her photos every 5 mins LOL
 Passionfruit beer (yum) and raspberry schnapps
 This was our pretzel???? LOL tasted like very nice pan bread. We were at Essen on Broadway btw LOL

 Pork Belly
 Pinwheel sausage
 I liked their furniture
 Brunch with my babes the next day
 Mocha milkshake was a mistake. Just like all mochas are... LOL
 I had the smoked salmon and roasted field mushroom omelette and Huynh had the chicken burger. We love beer batter chups
 Tuna Shoppin'
 This loser won't stop followin' me
 Stonegrill with the faggots
 BEER BATTER CHIPS LOL
 Collin had the ribs :)

 Which brings us to yesterday. Bobs, Eeh and I had lunch at the bistro. We picked up Em and Collin after and on a whim, decided to pierce our bodies LOL
 Brow bros


 Eeh looks genuinely scared LOL
Bobs decided to join us :) 4/5. Not a bad outcome LOL

weeks 3 and 4
Tuesday, August 6, 2013 // 6:49 AM

 I believe this was sunday. We ate Thai and I got the worst stomach alien LOL We played bloody oath and Eeh received the whole deck's worth of punishment. He took it like a man, hiding under his jacket LOL

 Hellen and I gave collin's head a buzz. He looks evil.
 Hung out at Snez's the next day
 Played with her ancient antique phone
 Milanos with most of the kik. Maria made a crame
 WTF? later LOL This was so sweet. I could really use some right now. God I'm so hungry atm.

Went shoe shopping with Danny and Dalz at Macarthur Square LOL We found the Nike store...
 Drove around the city with this lesbian after the Canley v Canley ball game. Found this little burger/diner place. It was very nice LOL

Ordered the Aloha Burger which was v good

Got free Froyo :)
 Hellen dropped the free froyo LOL
 Baked a cake for Andrew's 19th the next night
 Put some salami undernear the upright strawberry LOL it was actually a damn good cake!!
 Ate dumplings at Ashfield and karaoke'd with ma babes
 Drove to Castle Hill and squished 8 people into Andrew's car LOL Maria and Drew are in the boot
 This was the view from the place we parked. It was pretty damn nice. We drove back to Huynhs and decided to go to the Gong the next day
 Bobs at the Gong
 Bobs running to Gong water
 Grilled cheese and sausages at the Gong
 STOP ALL BLUE TINTED PHOTOS I GOT A NEW PHONE, BUT OBVS THESE NEXT TWO PICS ARE FROM SOMEONE ELSES PHONE LOL

 NEW PHONE
 Visited Cat after doing something ... LOL I can't remeber
 Skate at endeavour with Dalz and Danzo. Left them early to get El Jannahs
 Bobs dancing with El Jannahs at Maria's
 Trinh's bday. Heaps fun!




 faggot









 faggots
 Tracey's birthday dinner !! Mound of chicken wings, yum!!!
 Engineering boys made ... this LOL


Had a good chat to them about Melboure :)

Dat came and downed 2/3 of a tequila bottle with Jacqueline

He kept telling the story of the something pig LOL

Drove him home

I have yet to upload the rest of the photos from my new phone :)

Will get to it soon LOL

So hungry

Byeeeeeeeee

JESS PHANNNNNNNNNNN